Walking along the harbor, I watch the sunlight glimmer on the water. The air feels fresh and crisp as it fills my nose and lungs with the salt water smell. Even the sunshine feels different on my skin than at home, but somehow, it still brings a small comfort, like I’m exactly where I need to be.

As I make my way to my destination, I pass by the little shops that it’s nestled between across the harbor. It must look stunning with the moon hanging above it at night. I imagine a lot of the artists getting inspiration watching the sun or night sky above the river.

With a deep inhale, I look at the sign above the door. Color My Life. Walking into the little shop, my heart leaps inside my chest at the sight of all the canvases, paint brushes, easels, and paints.

I peer around and see the walls painted in a magenta, the tables already prepped for the class coming, and a small stage where the teacher will guide us.

Today, I opted to take a class instead of the free paint hours. The painting we’re doing is of a table with wine glasses overlooking the city. Seems fitting upon my arrival to the city, and maybe I’ll even hang it up in my apartment.

I browse the place leisurely, touching the paint brushes with my free hand while the other holds a death grip on the wine bottle I brought.

A loud sound thrums from the low set stage, making me suck in a harsh breath. That’s where I see the instructor, setting up on stage and picking up the paint brushes she dropped.

She’s gorgeous.

Her dark brown hair is streaked in fiery, hot pink pieces, twirled up in a messy bun on top of her head and held together with paint brushes. Her amber eyes sparkle as she sets up the studio, the love for what she does so prevalent.

I smile at her paint covered overalls. I used to have a pair just like them. For now, I have a clean new canvas. Such a rhetoric for my life.

Red lipstick coats her lush lips and the smile never leaves her face as she continues to set up.

You won the genetic lottery.

I always preferred men, but I can respect a gorgeous woman. And look. After Ryan, I thought about canceling men out entirely to be honest. Maybe I’ll give it a shot.

As if she heard my thoughts, she turns around and faces me. A brilliant smile spreads across her face, revealing beautiful straight white teeth. Did I accidentally think out loud? I give a weary smile back.

It’s been so long since I’ve flirted.

“Welcome to Color My Life,” The woman purrs. “My name is Sam. What’s your name, gorgeous?” She saunters over to me.

Looking around to see if she’s talking to anyone else, I straighten my spine when I realize she isn’t. She finds her way to me, propping an elbow on the table with her chin in hand.

“My name’s Sunny. It’s nice to meet you.” My cheeks heat, convincing me my freckles will burn off.

I’ve never done this before. I’m actually flirting with a woman.

“Wow, I love that name! Gorgeous name for a gorgeous girl. Does your name have a backstory?” She bites her pinky. This girl knows exactly what she’s doing.

I breathe a laugh. “Um, my parents are kind of hippies. I grew up in a very sunny place, that’s pretty much the reason. It’s boring.” I waive a hand of dismissal.

It’s a partial truth, but I’m not ready to give the full story.

“Oh honey, there is no way someone like you could be boring. I can feel it,” she winks. “Let’s see if those curls are as wild as the girl who has them.”

My jaw practically hits the floor.

She bites her lip. “You like dick, don’t you?”

I bark out a laugh, realizing it’s the first time I’ve laughed since I left home. I didn’t realize how alone I’ve been since. The quiet was peaceful until it wasn’t, and now it’s just lonely.

“I have to admit that I have only ever been with men. But you’re definitely making me second guess myself.” I pathetically flirt back.

It’s the best I can give. If I’m being honest, I’ve only ever been with Ryan. I had a few childhood crushes and boyfriends, but Ryan was my first and only for everything. And I think that’s why this has been extra hard. I gave him everything, and when I had nothing left to give, he simply took it.

Sam’s smile widens. “I have that effect on people. Well, when you decide to cross that bridge, you let me know. Until then, we’ll just be best friends.”

“That sounds like a good deal to me,” I say, a weary smile on my face, because it feels like first grade all over again.

Sam’s eyes roll over my body. “Now let’s get to painting!” She announces as she claps her hands together.

“But, what about the other people?”

It ended up being only me.

I’m sorry mother, I tried.

Looking down at my overalls and arms, I realize I’m covered in paint, but feeling satisfied with the picture before me. It isn’t perfect, but just enough to hang in my little apartment.

Sam approaches me, also covered in paint. “Damn girl, you’re really good at this. Do you paint on the regular?”

“Yes, actually. I grew up painting with my mom. I haven’t in about a month or so during my transition here, though. So, I figured I’d find a place I can come to regularly now that I’m settled.”

“Well, come at your leisure. This is my own art studio. I opened it myself. No charge. Come and go as you wish. Use what you need.” She smiles at me, her words genuine.

“I can’t. Please, let me pay for my visits and the supplies I use. It’s not an issue, really.”

She waives a dismissive hand. “Money isn’t an issue for me. This is only for sport. Besides, you and I are besties now. Remember?”

I laugh. “Thank you, that truly means so much to me.” I fiddle with a paint brush. This little art studio feels safe for me. Probably safer than anywhere else, if I’m being honest.

“So, sexy Sunny, how long have you been in the city for?” Sam grabs another bottle of wine.

“About two weeks, now.” I’m still trying to understand how a month has already gone by since Ryan.

“You’re a baby to the city!” she chimes. “I grew up here. This city may seem like a daunting beast at first, but I promise, it truly is magical and not nearly as scary as you’d think a big city is. We definitely top New York because here, it’s like a family.”

“Yeah, it doesn’t seem as scary as I thought, especially coming from my small town.”

“What brought you here?” she asks, her amber eyes focusing on my lips.

I swallow the knot forming in my throat. Although I already feel like I can tell Sam everything, because that’s simply the person she is, I just don’t want to reopen the scars that finally started to mend themselves.

So, I give up a partial truth. “I’m a nurse here on a travel assignment.”

“Oh god.” She fans herself with her hand. “That’s fucking hot.”

I chuckle. “So this isn’t your full-time job?”

She sits down next to me and fills our glasses again with Rosè this time. I smile. I have a friend to drink wine with.

I’ve been isolated for so long. Sure, I talk to coworkers at work, but it’s work and that’s it. This is what friends do. Share a glass of wine, and tell stories.

She’s the first friend I’ve had in a long time.

“No, this is just the thing I actually love to do,” she says sarcastically. “My parents own a big ass investing company. They’re like the old money bastards.” She takes a sip of her wine. “So, after years of hiding my genius ability with numbers, it finally came to light when I took the SATs in high school. God, I can’t believe that was like, thirteen years ago? Anyways, regardless of my love for art, I went to college for finance and became the head of the finance department at their firm.”

“Wow.” I sip my wine. “You’re pretty incredible. Smart, gorgeous and artsy.”

“Yeah, I know.” She places her chin on her hand, her amber eyes beaming with curiosity. “Tell me more about you. I want to know it all.”

And I don’t know why, but for some reason, I do. I tell her all about what happened with Ryan and why I came here.

Maybe because I just needed to tell someone. Get an outsider’s view on what happened. Maybe I just needed validation that what I did was the right thing. Even though every day I beat myself up for leaving my home and my family, for leaving him the way he was, not knowing the outcome. How a part of me was lost and died the day I left. What he tried to take from me.

Or maybe, I’m just desperate and lonely, or plain crazy for spieling all my dirty laundry to this stranger when I told myself I wouldn’t.

But for some ridiculous reason, I just know I can trust Sam. I trust you more than myself.

I need someone to hold me accountable. And honestly, I just need someone to make me hold on period. I’ve spent too long wanting to let go.

So, I swallow the knot in my throat, and tell Sam all about that day, and all the events leading up to it. How it all brought me here, in this magical city, where I sit before a woman who I know will be a friend for a lifetime.

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