Lexi

“Shit. He’s awake.”

A sharp breath leaves me and I’m hyperaware of the silence on the other end of the line—a sign that Dez, too, is at a loss for words.

My eyes lower from Mom and Benny’s bedroom window and settle on the black G-Class parked in my headlights. I distinctly remember being warned to come in quietly after work because Benny would be turning in around ten tonight. Something about an early-morning meeting. I don’t know. Wasn’t really listening.

Yet, it’s midnight and the lamp on his side of the room is still glowing bright.

“A hundred bucks says he knows. I bet Stu couldn’t wait to call and snitch.” My engine goes quiet when I turn off the car, but there’s so much blood rushing through my ears I hardly notice the silence.

“I can’t say for sure Stu didn’t put in a call, but Pandora definitely just made that shit public.”

Rolling my eyes, I brace myself. “What’d she post?”

Dez’s fingers move across her phone screen and the sound plays through my car speakers.

“And I quote: ‘@QweenPandora—Looks like LostAngel’s gotten herself into a bit of trouble. Our eyes and ears at Cypress Pointe Memorial Hospital say a patient was admitted roughly an hour ago with two broken fingers, ranting about an attack at the hands of our resident bad girl, Lexi Rodriguez. The patient is rumored to be Cole Elliot, son of Stuart Elliot, owner of the bowling alley where LostAngel’s recently found herself gainfully employed. This story has yet to be confirmed, but it might be time for The Golden Crew to check in on the pack’s rebel. Anyone got eyes on LostAngel tonight? Warning: if spotted, keep your distance. Sounds like she might be rabid. Later, peeps—P’.”

I let out a breath to decompress, but it doesn’t work. The last thing anyone in this city needs is Pandora spreading her half-assed gossip around like it’s gospel. The worst part is, ninety-nine percent of her followers believe everything she posts. Makes no difference that none of us have a clue who she really is. Or if she’s even a she.

On cue, my phone starts sounding off with check-in texts from Blue, Jules, and Joss—the female counterparts of our ‘Golden Crew’ as Pandora calls us. Dez would’ve been blowing up my phone, too, if I didn’t already have her on the line.

“Perfect. Everyone’s seen it now.”

“Which is all the more reason to at least tell Benny the truth—that his friend’s asshole son thought it’d be ok to grope you at work, and that you broke his grimy fingers to show him he got that shit wrong. Your parents love you, Lex. They’d want to know what really happened.”

She isn’t wrong; they do love me, but there’s a flaw in this plan of hers. My mother and stepfather have only seen me as a screw-up in recent years, which means everything is somehow always my fault.

Always.

I can hear them now, accusing me of making a mountain out of a molehill, accusing me of looking for an excuse to justify the violent outburst. I’d likely never even get to the part about how I’ve dealt with this guy grabbing his dick whenever I walk past, or the constant barrage of innuendos about my tits and ass when no one else is around to hear them. However, there was a line drawn in the sand and Cole crossed it tonight. The douchebag cornered me in the freezer while I stocked a food shipment, then he touched me after I warned him not to. Slamming his hand in the door seemed perfectly reasonable at the time, but now that my head’s clear, I can see how that might have been overkill.

“You do have options, you know. Mi casa es tu casa,” Dez offers with a yawn. “Besides, I could use the help unpacking. I don’t have furniture yet, but I’ve got sleeping bags. Which, let’s be honest, are way more awesome than beds and couches, right?”

A laugh slips out and, for a second, I consider spending the weekend at her apartment, hanging on the south side with her and Uno—her temperamental rottweiler.

“I appreciate you, but I’ll pass. Benny will just be twice as pissed about this tomorrow if I avoid him. Besides, Mom’s away on business, so maybe he’ll get in touch with her tonight, so by the time she checks in tomorrow, she’ll be calm.”

Dez laughs and it doesn’t sound like she imagines it going quite that smoothly. “Well, go with God, woman.”

“Gee, thanks.”

We end our call and I do my version of a walk-of-shame as I head inside, but the source of my shame isn’t because I sent that asshat to the ER. It’s because I know this will count as another strike against me, another episode of “The Lexi Show”, as Mom likes to call it.

Little do they know, tonight, I did nothing wrong.

I manage to make it through the foyer without incident, but the moment I set my keys on the kitchen counter, I hear Benny storming this way.

Here we go.

“Four days, Lexi? Four days and not only did you get yourself fired, but you sent a guy to the hospital? That’s gotta be a new record. And not one to be proud of.”

“Can we please, please not do this tonight? It’s been a really long day.”

My words trail off and I open the fridge to grab a soda. As soon as I close it, I lay eyes on Benny’s angry scowl.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Your Highness. Did getting fired tire you out? If that’s the case, you’ve been exhausted all month, seeing as how this is the third job that’s let you go in that span of time.”

I hold my tongue. Mostly because, okay, yeah, two of the three firings were totally my fault, but not this one. I won’t bear that on my conscience, too. He and Stu are good friends, so I get that he’s ticked off after having put his neck on the line to get me in at the bowling alley. But still, I don’t feel like doing this right now.

“Want to hear something sad? You’ve set the bar so low, I’d be over the moon if you could just keep something good going for one solid year. One year without ruining a good thing. Hell, I’d settle for six months!” he barks out. “Six months of consistency, six months of you not fucking up.”

When he finishes, the glare of disappointment looming in his eyes is so familiar I’d swear it’s his default expression. Only, that look leaves whenever his bio-kids, Louisa and Lorenzo, come around. They’re both successful, productive adults. Nothing like Amelia and me—the two train wrecks he inherited when he married Mom more than a decade ago. He adopted us because our dad’s a deadbeat and willingly relinquished his rights. But more than that, Benny did it because he’s big on family and there’s genuine love between us. However, I’m convinced he regrets taking us on sometimes.

“And what about the rumor? People are saying you did this on purpose. Please, tell me that isn’t true. Tell me you’re not so far gone that doing bodily harm to another human being is something you’re capable of.”

He pauses, likely waiting for me to defend myself, to say the rumor’s a lie, but it isn’t. I hurt Cole on purpose, and I’d do it again.

“Shit, Lex. You’re beyond my help,” Benny says, unable to hide the shakiness in his voice. “I’ve asked you to see a professional, someone to help you confront your demons, but you just keep digging yourself into a deeper pit.”

There’s sadness in his eyes and I know what he’s thinking. That if I don’t get my shit together, I’ll end up like my sister—locked up because her last DUI cost people their lives.

His suggestion echoes in my thoughts, but I don’t say a word. The only ‘demon’ I need to confront is Arturo, and he’s been in the wind since I was six. If you don’t count the occasional pop-ins over the years that only left me more scarred, more damaged.

“I have to face my colleagues at the university in the morning, knowing they’ve all heard. Does that even cross your mind? That the shit you do reflects poorly on all of us?” Benny asks.

My head lowers and I wish I had an answer he’d accept, but the truth is, yes, I know he and Mom catch a lot of heat for my actions. However, in the moment, I pull the trigger without weighing the consequences.

Every damn time.

“This is the end of the road. I know I’ve said that before, but I mean it this time. We have to break this cycle and the only thing I have left in my arsenal is tough love. The rules for after you graduated were clear—you had to either enroll in school or hold down a job. One of the two. You’ve failed to do either, so you’ve gotta go, Lex. I’m sorry. You’ve got thirty days to find someplace else to live.”

“And you expect me to do that without a job?”

He shrugs, no longer making eye-contact. “You’re an adult, so I guess that’s something you’ll have to figure out. All I know is you’re out of chances and after that deadline, you’re no longer welcome here.”

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.”

“Nope. Not this time,” he answers as that stern look returns.

When he begins putting distance between us, dismissively moving toward the steps, I feel the pull to plead my case.

“I’ll… find work,” I blurt out. “Maybe there’s a pet store hiring. You know I’m good with animals. I’ll start looking tomorrow.”

I’m not even finished speaking when Benny scoffs and lifts his hands in exasperation.

“At this point, I’d buy into your promises about as much as I’d believe the devil swearing he’ll be on his best behavior, Lex. My only solace is that Stu isn’t pressing charges. He’s willing to let bygones be bygones if I settle Cole’s ER expenses once they’re billed.”

I hate this. So, so much.

“I’ll pay you back. Every cent.”

My offer never earns a reply. Instead, he waves me off while making his exit. Apparently, I’m too tragic to stomach tonight, which seems to be a common side-effect of my condition—being a compulsive screw up.

And despite what people say, you can’t convince me that shit’s not contagious.

Thanks for the hand-me-down, Arturo.